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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Meet Ghetto Woman

Have you been to The Pioneer Woman's website?  Oh it's amazing.  I love to drool at pictures of her life.  She lives in the country.  They have horses and cows.  And a beautiful house.  And beautiful kids.  It's all so picturesque.  She can cook, and the pictures of her cooking make you want to eat it off of the page.  And right now, I don't want to cook it myself, so dreaming about enjoying her food is as far as I'm getting.  

So, I have this nice camera.  I don't know how to use it well though.  It's a bummer.  I should take a photography class.  Because, also on her site are tips for taking fun pics and improving them with photoshop.  I have no idea what she means though, so I can't do those fancy things.  

It's hard not to dream of her life as being wonderful.  Though in a recent "confession" post she talked about haircuts with her kids, and her bursting into tears because of how haircuts might interfere with their country life and need for ponytails.  And then she and the girls had to skip going out to eat in the big city (Tulsa) and get home (3 hours away) so they could help feed the horses.  I didn't like how that sounded.  Definitely too much responsibility for animals for my taste.  

So, I thought about how I could pretend to be as awesome as her (at least on my blog).  And I couldn't come up with much.  I don't have the patience to take photos while cooking, or post them within 6 months of taking them.  Let's face it, there are no cows, horses, or even cute dogs I can take pictures of in my back yard.  And if I go outside to take pics, my reality is inevitable:  I live in the ghetto.

So, wouldn't it be fun to have a "Ghetto Woman" website?  Instead of beautiful pics of horses, deer, and other wildlife, I could photograph the teenagers who walk down my street with baseball bats, and their butts sticking out of their pants.  Or I could set up a hidden camera at 2 am and catch my neighbors conducting their likely illegal business.  Now that would be exciting.  Awe inspiring really.  I could take an early morning frosty picture of the glass in my storage shed that has a bullet hole in it.  Nice, huh?  What about the kids walking around the neighborhood with b.b. guns and hoodies trying to look like they're wannabe gangstas?  Now that's living.  

It just oozes with peace and tranquility, don't you think?  Surely I could sell some sort of book about our dream-life here, where we keep our alarm on even during the day.  Where, yesterday when I saw a car parked in my driveway that I didn't recognize, and as soon as my face shown in the window it sped off, and then I had paranoid thoughts about who that was and why they acted so suspicious, for the rest of the day and often during my restless night.  Yeah, dreams are made of such things.  

Look out Pioneer Woman.  Ghetto Woman might just take the cake in awesomeness and blogging.  People will be inspired, I tell ya.

5 comments:

Gayla said...

Pioneer Woman probably has some really awful habit- like she's secretly hooked on and cooking meth in that fancy kitchen of hers. HA! She should take some pix of THAT and put them on her website!!!

I like your ghetto woman idea... but not the cars speeding out of your driveway! That is freaky.

SarahinOK said...

I'd read your 'Ghetto Woman' blog. :) I could give some stories from my Ghetto days back when I got my first apartment in Tulsa. Good times. Drunk/high neighbors having spiritual discussions with me, having my car broken into while the neighbor watched and told me about it later... :) Although I could prayer walk and pass a mosque, a morman church, drug dealers and something else random that I can't remember, all within a block of my place where I lived alone! Ahh!:)

SarahinOK said...

Oh- and do you know that Pioneer Woman is from Bartlesville. :) Small world.

zach+kate said...

Anjanette, you make me laugh! Loved your post.

RACHEL said...

Rock on Ghetto Woman. I think your photos could be pretty interesting. Add that to photies of your beautiful house, beautiful girls and glimpses of your newly preggers self, and we could see God's light in the darkness.